Sometimes it is better to be bold than pleasant.
Not everyone has to like you.
Stop trying so hard.
“Just be nice, keep smiling, bro.”
“Vibrate positive, and you will attract positive people.”
“It’s not what you have. It’s who you know, so try to fit in and move up the social ladder.”
Bullsh*t.
Dr. Jordan B Peterson said, “Everyone says you must be harmless and hide your competitiveness. But that’s a mistake; you must be a monster and then learn to control it.”
And I agree 🙂
The world is a jungle, and you have to survive.
You must go to the arena and do your best. You have to compete, period.
Saying yes to everyone is saying no to yourself.
You can’t please everyone. Trying to do so is a waste of time and energy.
The day has only 24 hours for you and everyone… Unless…
Unless… you are the type of person who knows how to manipulate others, those people who gaslight you to get you to seek their approval.
Those people get their 24 hours, and as many as you let them steal.
Do the math.
- The guy you want to please: 24 hours + 8 hours of your time (doing him favors like moving, accompanying him to the bar because he has no one to go out with, or helping him clean the garden) = 36 hours.
- You: 24 hours — the 8 hours you give to your supposed friend, boss, family member, etc. = 16 hours.
Who do you think will get further in life? The guy you want to please. (obviously).
Acceptance is more addictive than heroin, I get it.
But you need to quit the habit of looking for acceptance at any cost.
Let’s go deeper.
You’ve heard that you have the average energy of the five people you hang out with the most. Right?
It’s worst than that.
You’re not only the average of the people you hang out with, but you are also de average of,
- The most recurrent thoughts you have.
- The most recurrent complaints you made.
- The most things you do.
And that’s why it is so f*cking insane trying to be friendly with everyone because pleasing people becomes a complaint, a recurring thought, and what you do most.
Sometimes you have to be a little bit selfish for your mental health.
Negativity is more potent than positivity.
Let’s speak in the adult mode for a second; when you read or hear lousy feedback from somebody, you forget all the good ones.
It happens to me all the time.
Maybe I have a hundred comments daily between Twitter, TikTok, email, and so on. And I try to check it all. The point is that when I have a terrible comment, It hurts. And that comment stays in my head for so long that the power of the goods messages loses power in me.
And if I let the haters steal my self-esteem, I’ll stop doing my job. So I block them.
It’s not childish to block them. I DON’T HAVE TO LIKE EVERYBODY. And of course, NOT EVERYONE HAS TO LIKE ME.
I have to be able to keep doing my job. And for doing that, I know I can’t be cool with everybody.
And so, just as I take care of my articles, I take care of my environment.
I don’t allow people to get close to me who pollute my mind with negative thoughts that only want to harm me.
Nor do I allow harmful content to infect my brain. You are what you eat, don’t forget that. And your brain consumes (eats information).
Takeaway
It is better to be liked by a few than to have many pretend to like you.
When you try to please everyone, you lose yourself. And to stand out in life, you need to be heard. And it’s going to be very difficult for you to do that without hurting some sensitivities.
Stop being the smiling guy, be the conquer guy instead.
Stop being the complacent servant that everyone tramples on. Claim your crown.
A virtual hug
AG
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