- The opinion of others.
Opinions are like asses; everyone has one.
Suppose you allow other people’s opinions to have any power over you. In that case, you’ll spend your day trying to please everyone, and you’ll be hurt when you don’t meet their expectations.
Do things because they come from inside you, not because your parents, children, partner, or boss applauds them.
You know what you should do, do it, and work in good faith to have a clear conscience and not worry about what they think of you.
Shame is so harmful that those who feel it chronically do not want to be seen by anyone; they want to disappear.
Therefore, what you are ashamed of hurts you. And you cannot allow shame to crystallize in your life and become chronic. Or you will damage not only your soul but also your mind.
How do you stop feeling shame? By understanding how it works.
You must understand that shame is a dissonance between who you are and who you was.
You are ashamed of what you did (past) and now (present) you regret.
The trick is to know why you regret it.
You regret it because you are no longer the same person who made that mistake; you have evolved.
And that’s good because you have changed 🙂
Every time you feel ashamed of something, remember that what happens is that you are no longer the person who made a mistake but an improved version of yourself.
- Not living in the now.
Living in the present is not just New Age advice. It is something tangible that improves your life if you apply it. And I’m going to prove it to you.
Let’s start with the past.
Think of a beautiful moment in your history.
Think of a family member who is no longer with you.
Think of your childhood summers.
Think of your first love.
Those moments are gone and won’t come back, no matter how much you remember them in your head.
And I’m not saying you have to forget them; a little nostalgia is okay, but if you’re still obsessing over your ex’s WhatsApp status after five years, you might have a problem, my friend.
Now, the future. Think about something you want to achieve in the future.
A nice house.
A successful business.
None of it is in the now. Thinking about it occasionally keeps you focused, but obsessing about it hurts you.
Obsessively thinking about the future is like crossing the street without looking at the traffic light. Eventually, you will get run over.
There is only now; you can get to that bright future by acting today.
Stop hurting yourself and pay more attention to what you have, not what you had or what you want to have. And your life will surely change for the better.
You want to go one way, and life takes you another, generating frustration and anger and making you impatient.
It happens to all of us.
Life has its plan, even if you have yours. So focus on the things under your control and don’t worry about the outcome and the opinions of others.
Chronic nonconformity makes you vulnerable.
You will always want more; greed makes you the buyer, not the seller. And the one who buys pays the price of the one who sells. Read it again.
Wanting it all “fast” makes things worse.
Some people smell the need, the desperation, the rush.
So do yourself a favor and take your time.
Accept life’s reactions and act accordingly; don’t try to take shortcuts.
There are no shortcuts to what makes you happy, and if there were, you wouldn’t take them because the fun is the journey.
A virutal hug