Keanu Reeves was once asked, “What do you think happens when you die? And after a deep sigh, he replied, “That those who love us will miss us.”
That’s why we must never forget that time is more important than money, love is more important than work, and friendship is more important than contacts. Because when you are no longer here, and the lights go out, only those who loved you will remember you.
But how to be loved by those around us?
In my opinion, the essential thing is to be a pillar of society. A good friend, a good counselor, someone strong enough to help, listen and offer a shoulder to cry whenever someone needs.
But being like that is not easy. Life is a war, and war is full of cowards who shy away from hardship.
Surely you know what I’m talking about; Surely, you had felt the betrayal of someone close to you when you needed it the most because the problem you had was beyond him, and he was not willing to help you.
That is why today I want to talk to you about the famous strategist Sunt Tzu and some of his advice compiled in his work, The Art of War so that you can win the battle of the day to day and become a brave person worthy of being loved, worthy of being remembered.
1. Avoiding temptation is always better than facing it.
“To achieve a hundred victories in a hundred battles is not the summit of skill. Surrendering the enemy without fighting is the pinnacle of skill.” — Sun Tzu.
- It’s better to hide your cell phone than to have it in front of you and have to use willpower not to touch it.
- It’s better to stop going to the bar to socialize than to use willpower to order a Coke instead of a drink.
- It’s better to empty your fridge of junk food and fill it with vegetables and fresh foods than to have pizzas, sodas, and other fast foods and promise yourself that you will only use them in case of an Emergency.
Every day you wake up with a limited amount of energy. Using willpower depletes it twice as fast. Therefore it will always be better to avoid temptation than to face it.
Your life and relationship with others improve when you avoid certain things, people, and situations instead of confronting them.
- Avoiding conflict makes you a person people will not be afraid to be around.
- Avoiding addictions will make you a trustworthy person.
- Avoiding lousy company will take you further than you can imagine.
Listen to Sun Tzu and don’t fight; flow. The warrior’s skill lies in his ability to avoid conflict, not in his skill with the sword.
2. Try to be 1% better every day.
“In ancient times skilled warriors began by making themselves invincible and waited for the moment when the enemy was vulnerable.” — Sun Tzu.
No one is born knowing. Everything needs a process. To be good at something takes at least 10k hours of deliberate practice.
It is never too late to learn. An old saying goes, “the best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is today”.
Today you have the opportunity to reinvent yourself.
Today you have the opportunity to be better.
Today you have the opportunity to change your life.
Becoming better is not something superficial. It is significant because nobody wants someone weak next to them when the going gets tough. And if you’re going to be remembered fondly, it’s up to you to get your act together and make yourself a little bit better every day.
Never stop learning, and remember that opportunity comes when the warrior is ready. Prepare yourself, and your time will come.
3. Do not postpone your goals.
“When you have insufficient means, defense is appropriate; with abundant means, attack.” — Sun Tzu.
Do not fall into paralysis by analysis.
There will always be something out of your control. And you have to learn to be ok with that fact. Because otherwise, you’ll never grow as a person.
Sometimes it is scary, but you have to move on when the time comes.
- First, learn.
- Second, accumulate resources and skills.
- Third, go and get what you want.
- Forth repeat.
Remember the words of the Bible,
Everything has its proper time; there is a season for everything under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to harvest; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to destroy, and a time to build; a time to mourn, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to leap for joy; a time to scatter stones, and a time to gather them up; a time to embrace, and a time to part; a time to try, and a time to cease; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; a time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace. — Ecclesiastes 3:1–8 NIV.
Now is your time. Please don’t waste it.
4. In difficult situations, do not lose your temper.
“Too frequent rewards indicate that the general is running out of resources, and too frequent punishments, that he is full of distress.” — Sun Tzu.
Don’t show your cards, mate. Instead, you have to train your Pokerface when adversity comes. And it will come, always comes.
Being condescending to others shows.
Being overly generous generates suspicion.
Suddenly changing your ways is rare.
When someone constantly rewards us or tells us what we want to hear, they probably want something from us.
On the other hand, when someone keeps blaming others for their problems, they are desperate.
Such a person will never be a good leader.
The community you belong to needs you to be like an oak tree and give shade when the sun is at its hottest.
Being a leader in good times is simple. The hard part is to be calm when all else fails.
And believe me, if you want to be remembered and loved by your inner circle, the best thing you can do is to become a safe harbor every time the storm comes.
Everyone will come to you for protection, advice, love, or help if you do it.
A virtual hug