Sometimes everything is fine, and suddenly all goes to hell.
Do you know that feeling?
When karma hits you hard, and your dog dies, you lose your job, or your mother-in-law says she will spend a vacation at your house and stay for a whole year.
Shit happens
But the attitude with which we face life makes all the difference.
When I forget, I repeat to myself this phrase from the American theologian Reinhold Niebuhr,
“God, grant me the serenity to accept what I cannot change, courage to change the things I can change, and wisdom to recognize the difference.”
And when I focus, I usually discover that I am feeling bad for one of these seven reasons.
1. Because I’m not taking a shower
One of the reasons my life sucks is laziness for not making the conscious, daily effort to cleanse the bad vibes out of my life.
You have to shower your soul, spirit, or whatever you call it every day because we get dirty. Toxic people make us unclean; critics make us dirty; even people who love us often make us dirty without realizing it.
Taking a symbolic or real shower, be aware that you are eliminating all that negativity, helps feel good again.
2. Because I am not well positioned
Sometimes my life sucks because I’m in the right place but being dumb at the right time.
I get distracted easily, and opportunities pass in front of me like ice cream in the middle of August, and by the time I want to buy one, the ice cream shop is closed.
In life, it’s not enough to be prepared and surround yourself with the right people (this makes it easier for you to have opportunities); you also need to be attentive. Because if you are not, someone else will eat your ice cream when the ice cream man comes.
3. Because I forget that I don’t control the universe
I cannot choose what life does with me; I can only decide what I will do with my life; with the time I have left to live.
It’s as if life were the sea and I were a sailor. The only thing I can do is choose one course or another, but if a storm comes and sweeps the deck of my ship, I can not avoid it.
We spend our lives wondering why this or that happened to us, and there is no point in doing so. The best thing to do is to take the helm and try to survive the storm.
4. Because I’m not failing enough.
Sometimes things don’t move forward, and I get frustrated. I wonder why others are doing better than me, and envy eats me inside.
Then I realize that I am very comfortable in my comfort zone, and I am not paying the price of victory: to fail.
- Why do my friends have a partner and I don’t?
Because they downloaded a dating app and went through hundreds of horrible dates until they found a person to start a relationship with, they dared to fail repeatedly until they achieved their goal.
- Why do my friends make more money than me?
Because they have more clients, they got them by offering their services to more people than me and facing rejection hundreds of times more than me until they rounded up their client portfolio.
And so on.
The people who succeed are the ones who fail the most.
5. Because I don’t accept that all cycles end.
Life is about phases, and each one has a beginning and an end, but no one tells you this in school. And it is the reason for a lot of pain and dissatisfaction.
It used to hurt me to lose people until I understood that there are three types of friends: always, the ones for a while, and the ones for convenience.
Nothing lasts forever in this world. And you have to accept that something ends, be it a stage or a relationship, to start the next one. If you don’t, pain comes into your life because pain always comes when you stay in the past, and its function is to push you to move forward.
6. Because I mix up the three types of love.
Life has taught me that there are three types of love
- Lust.
- Passion.
- And commitment.
- Lust is that chemical connection you feel with someone one crazy night, and you end up at the nearest hotel doing things you’ll probably regret in the morning.
- Passion happens in the early stages of a relationship and can last for a couple of years, but passion is over, and if there is no everyday life project, that relationship is doomed to fail.
- Commitment is a love that comes when you have chosen the right person; it is a love that understands that passion comes and goes and that the important thing is to support your partner and build a common life project.
I have often confused the three types of love with each other throughout my life, and I can tell you that it hurts. So please don’t do it.
7. Because I waste my time with people who don’t listen.
Life does not owe me anything and much less the people. The mistake that causes me the most pain is trying to help those who do not want to be helped.
Expecting too much from others is a great source of frustration. People are the way they are, and changing them is not always convenient.
If someone doesn’t want to listen to your advice, the best thing to do is leave.
If someone doesn’t pay attention to you, the best thing you can do is leave.
If someone doesn’t want to spend time with you, the best thing to do is leave.
Remember that the time you give to someone who doesn’t appreciate you, you take it away from someone else who may enjoy it more.
Identifying what happens to me when life sucks helps me correct my course and get back on the path to happiness. That’s why I’ve written this article if you identify yourself at some point. If so, let me know in the comments.
See you in the following article.
A virtual hug
AG
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