Four Habits of Deeply Mean People

#3–They always suspect others.

Photo by Tyler Nix on Unsplash

In 1888 a French newspaper announced Alfred Nobel’s death by mistake — the one who died was his brother Ludwig — and this allowed Alfred to find out what people would think of him when he died.

It was not good news, “Death merchant dies,” read the headline.

Alfred Nobel invented dynamite. And dynamite comes from the Greek word dynamis, meaning “power.” But it seems Alfred’s power lay in people’s fear of him rather than respect.

This fact made him change the Chip, and Alfred wanted to change before he died.

Aware that his wealth came from an invention that took many lives, Alfred tried to compensate society by creating the Nobel prize with his fortune.

Alfred died eight years after reading that article, in 1896, but he had the opportunity to repent, take stock of his life, and try to be a better person.

Many of us don’t have that opportunity-fortunately. Our fake death doesn’t appear in the digital newspapers-but we can learn what habits make us bad people and try to improve certain aspects of our lives,

Here are four of those habits characteristic of mean people.

1. They avoid taking responsibility

Mean people used to blame everyone for their problems but never take responsibility for their screw-ups.

Look at your life. I bet you have, at least, someone who always points out the mistakes of others but never acknowledges their own.

But that doesn’t make a person 100% petty.

For that, they have to go a step further and not only point the finger at those who screw up and avoid all responsibility when they do the same but also blame others for their screw-ups.


Don’t do that. Don’t blame others for your errors. The only way you learn it’s by failing. And if you don’t admit your faults, you will never grow.

2. They never enjoy life

Mean people are incapable of celebrating a victory because they are constantly comparing themselves to those who are doing better.

In the latest episode of The Joe Rogan Experience, Joe tells Ryan Holiday how in one of the best moments of his career, when he was finally working on a sitcom, he realized that his co-stars were incapable of appreciating the joys of victory.

They always bought magazines like Vanity Fair and compared themselves to other actors. And criticizing them.

They were envious and unable to enjoy their sitcom success.


Comparing yourself with others not only sucks but will also suck your energy dry and turn you into a mediocre person.

Ryan Holiday said it best after hearing Joe’s sitcom anecdote.

He said, “If good work comes from being present. Comparing yourself with others prevents your ability from being great because you’re spreading your energy out of the world on stuff that doesn’t matter instead of being the best you can be.”

3. They always suspect others

Mean people distrust others because they see themselves reflected in everyone. Yet, because their vision of the world stems from their way of being, that distrust is their shield against the consequences of their actions.

Mean people are paranoid people. And often see double intention y the good things people do, even is are genuine signs of generosity.


Being grateful is the antidote for the poison of being mean.

Be grateful and value the people close to you. And don’t be suspicious of them, maybe they want the best for you, and that’s why they help you.

4. They lie to themselves a lot

If you ask yourself, “How can X do Y?” the answer is simple, people lie to themselves, A LOT.

A former friend was cheating on his girlfriend with her best friend.

Taking advantage of the fact that his girlfriend left for a year to do her medical internship in the United States, this guy took the opportunity to have a relationship with another doctor who was also a close friend of his girlfriend.

After six months, my ex-friend and his lover visited his official girlfriend in Florida. And they went on a cruise together.

His girlfriend didn’t find out until a year after that.

At first, my ex-friend said that he had misbehaved with both of them, but little by little, he became self-deceived, convincing himself that they were the ones who had taken advantage of his vulnerability. The mistress because he felt lonely. And the girlfriend because she didn’t think of him when she left him alone.

Ultimately, my ex-friend felt he was the victim, not the victimizer.


If you don’t want to turn into a disgusting person, you must try not to deceive yourself and accept responsibility for your actions.

A virtual hug


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