#4-The insignificant reminds us of the value of the important.
Paradox literally means “thought that apparently involves a contradiction.”
And our life is full of contradictions that we do not understand and surprise us.
I have compiled four of them to analyze so we can understand each other better.
1. Sometimes, wasting time is gaining it because only when you lose track of time do you genuinely enjoy it.
“Time is the most valuable thing a person can spend. “— Paracelsus.
You enjoy the day only when you are with someone with no goal other than enjoying their company.
The absence of hidden interests in social interactions makes us relax. And relaxing makes us gain time in life.
- It happens when we have a beer with friends watching a game.
- It happens when we meditate.
- It happens when we go for a walk.
- It happens when we do crossword puzzles, jigsaw puzzles, or play video games.
You gain a lifetime when we are supposed to be wasting it. That happens because life is not all about obligations, life is joy, and you must know how to let yourself go.
2. Love makes you feel that someone is unique, but that love can be felt in more than one person.
“We seek happiness but without knowing where, as drunkards seek their home knowing that they have one. “— François Marie Arouet Voltaire.
When we fall in love with someone, we believe that person is unique: they are the one. And it’s not so.
One falls in love with a set of qualities and characteristics found in more than one person. Still, when we love someone specifically with those characteristics and qualities, we think that only that person exists for us in the whole universe.
And it is not so.
Then we break the relationship, and we fall in love again, and we think that this new time is the right one and that the last time we were wrong. But it’s all a mirage.
3. Sometimes, to be oneself, we have to be someone else
“The best thing in the world is to know how to belong to oneself. “— Michel de Montaigne.
In this society, we have to pretend a role to be ourselves.
Without money, you can’t fulfill your life. And for that, you have to behave in a specific way when you work that doesn’t have to correspond to your natural way of being.
The same thing happens when we want to find a partner: we pretend to be who we are to increase our chances of pleasing the person we have gone out to dinner or the movies with.
Many would say that they are different parts of the same self. But we all know that we have to play a role, to be who we are not, to be functional and not have too many problems living in society.
The funny thing is that the most authentic people are the ones who tend to stand out. Because when we see them, we feel they are not afraid and do not wear masks, which liberates us as a breath of fresh air.
In the end, you realize that, like everything in life, you have to find the middle ground: to be ourselves for as long as possible during the day to improve our satisfaction with the life we lead.
So if we choose jobs, friendships, and partners where we can be ourselves (most of the time), we live with less stress and are happier.
4. The insignificant reminds us of the value of the important
“If life is simple, satisfaction must come. Simplicity is essential for happiness.” — Dalai Lama.
The little things in life are what make life worth living.
- Enjoying a sunset.
- Waking up next to your loved one.
- A hug from your mother.
These are small gestures that have no economic value but have emotional value. And that is precisely why they remind us that we are human.
They make us understand that the most valuable things in life are love, friendship, and happiness.
We need those little things daily in order not to forget our priorities.
- To not trade our family for a raise for which you have to sacrifice your time at home by working overtime.
- To not stop seeing our lifelong friends spend that time mingling with people with contacts that we think can be more useful to us.
- Do not neglect our relationship as a couple, thinking that giving jewelry or trips is better for the relationship than being available and always ready to listen, understand, and support.
Small things make us great. Don’t forget that.
A virtual hug