Follow the light. It is your way out.
At some point in our lives, we dug a hole and hid our heads like ostriches do when they are afraid.
Little by little, we made that hole more profound to escape from shame, expectations, and the World.
And the hole ended up swallowing us.
Then time passed and buried us.
In that hole, in the beginning, we felt good; it was like a return to the mother’s womb, only it was not the mother’s womb, and in the end, we realized that air and freedom were scarce there.
There was no umbilical cord, just darkness and tons of dirt over our heads—a subway prison built of idleness, laziness, addictions, and bad habits.
But one fine day, something happens, the World trembles, and a small crack opens in our subway tomb.
And through that crack, the miracle happens: light and air enter the hole.
But since we have been in the dark for a long time, we are much more afraid than when we first decided to enter it.
That’s when you must remember these three things not to waste that little miracle.
Don’t turn your back on the light.
The first reaction when something novel threatens to change our way of life is to reject it with all our might.
We become like little child who doesn’t want to grow up, and we make a tantrum so that we don’t have to change. Because we are terrified of the unknown, we do not trust anything and anyone, and that light that slips through the crack does not give us confidence.
And so we turn our backs on the light. And it may be years until we approach the little crack again.
My mother is 64 years old; her father suffered from Alzheimer’s disease. And her older siblings have Alzheimer’s. But she was very comfortable doing nothing about it until my brother started dating a Latvian woman who only spoke English.
Ultimately, what scared her so much (learning new things) was necessary for her to understand her future daughter-in-law. And getting out of his comfort zone (getting closer to the light) was the best thing that could have happened to him.
She started using apps to learn English, and little by little, her memory improved, and now she has new friends that she didn’t have access to before because she didn’t speak English.
He finally stopped throwing tantrums and came to light. And like a child who has to be forced to go to the shower, but then there is no one to get him out, she spends all day practicing English.
Moral: Don’t turn your back on the light. If something suddenly shakes your life and opens a crack (an opportunity), take advantage of it.
Don’t be afraid of the light; it’s expected to hurt.
Light hurts when we have been locked in our hole for a long time because we are not used to it; our eyes must get used to it.
But that doesn’t mean that light is terrible. It means it requires a period of adaptation to accept the new reality.
When we try to change our lives, it’s expected that it sucks at first. I remember like it was yesterday, the first time I hit rock bottom. I was 33 years old and needed to change my habits because if I didn’t, I knew I would die.
And at first, the light hurt. It hurts to train every day. It hurts to diet. It hurt to quit smoking. It hurt to stop drinking. It hurt to leave a lousy company.
Everything that would bring me closer to the light (to a healthy life) hurt.
But with time (years), everything got better. If today you offer me a cigarette, 1) I don’t smoke it, 2) I don’t feel like I’m missing anything, and 3) I remind myself that there is no temporary pleasure that justifies not feeling as healthy as I feel.
Moral: eventually, you get used to the light and don’t want to return to the hole. The darkness is no longer a hiding place when you discover the truth.
Follow the light. It is your way out.
When you are lucky enough to find a crack in your prison of darkness, approach it and dig with your bare hands. Dig a tunnel upward, and come out into the sunlight.
You will bloom like a beautiful flower that sprouts from seed and makes its way through the manure.
That dung is everything where you used to bury yourself: addictions, lousy company, bad habits, limiting beliefs; you name it.
The good thing about manure is that it nourishes you and makes you bloom much stronger.
And your experience will be of great help to others.
I have had such a wrong time, and I have done so much damage to the people around me that now instead of repenting, I use all the shit in which I have lived buried as fuel to help those who are going through what I have gone through.
Moral: I don’t know what your problem is, but I want you to think that if you overcome it, and get out of that hole in which you find yourself, then you will serve as an inspiration to all those who are still buried. And that gives meaning to your life and to have gone through so much shit.
Last words
A reader (I won’t say her name to respect her anonymity) told me this yesterday, Thank you, AG. You opened up the vulnerability door of your soul, and we, as your readers, must acknowledge the courage needed to do that. (I hope I have that courage when I grow up! I’m 46 and still struggle to open that door to the World)
If you read this article, I hope it will help you to open the door. Don’t be scared and go towards the light; everything gets better.
A virtual hug
AG
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