Time to unveil the family wisdom.
My grandfather was a happy man.
- He had eight children, 16 grandchildren, and four great-grandchildren.
- He died with more money than he ever dreamed of having.
- He had land, property, and stocks.
- He had a marriage that lasted over 60 years.
And because of all this, many said that the secret of his happiness was that he was fortunate.
Luck? Luck to be born in the time of famine? Luck to do three years of compulsory military service? Luck to live the Spanish civil war? Chance to live almost 40 years of military dictatorship?
No.
My grandfather was never lucky; what he had was a method to be happy. And shortly before he died, he shared it with me.
My grandfather’s method of being happy.
My grandfather died when I hit rock bottom from a lifetime of addictions and excesses. And before he died, he called me occasionally to help me with his advice.
In one of those calls, he told me, “AG, you know the fable of King Midas, who turned everything he touched into gold? Well, there is also the fable of King Shit, a guy who turns everything he touches into shit. And in this life, you’ll get to be both.”
King Midas
King Midas was a king of Phrygia and reigned between about 740 BC and 696 BC. According to Greek mythology, he turned everything he touched into gold.
And in life, as my grandfather explained to me, there are times when whatever we do, we turn everything into gold: it turns out well.
And it is in these times of prosperity we have to behave with greater caution because they are moments to grow but also to become assholes.
I remember in the phone conversation, he said, “Neither when you win are you as good as you think you are, nor when you lose are you as bad as people think you are. So when you do well, don’t think you’re the last Coca-Cola in the desert because you’re not.”
So the first part of my grandfather’s method for having a happy life is to avoid pride at all costs when things are going well. And to realize that we are not the masters of the universe when we win, nor the worst losers when we fail: keep our feet on the ground.
King Shit
King Shit would be something like the antagonist of King Midas. He is a guy who turns everything he touches into shit, no matter how good his intentions are.
My grandfather told me, “Grandson, there will be times when nothing goes right, everything you build falls apart, and you hurt everyone you love. And the important thing in those situations is to minimize the damage.”
According to my grandfather, you must minimize the collateral damage in life because life is a war, and there are always victims in every battle.
So when things go wrong, according to my grandfather, you must avoid taking it out on your loved ones, your neighbor, or your co-worker.
This constitutes the second point of my grandfather’s method to be happy: do good and don’t look at whom, but if trying to do well, everything goes wrong, try to harm as little as possible the people you love and don’t blame them for your misfortunes.
Conclusion
After my grandfather told me about his method, I mentally analyzed his life. I remembered phrases he used to say to me as a child, “Two don’t argue if one doesn’t want to” or “Whoever despises you should not be appreciated.”
And I realized that my grandfather applied what he preached.
He had never strutted about his good fortune, money, or land in front of anyone. And he had avoided arguments as much as possible.
Nor did he complain when things went badly for him.
And a father of eight children has all the chances that one of them will give him a hard time at some point. My grandfather, however, never complained about his problems; he solved them if he could, and if not, he tried to live with them.
Takeaway
In short, my grandfather’s secret method for a happy life is not to take your fortune for granted, to work every day, and not to take your bad patches out on your loved ones or worry them unnecessarily.
Because this way, people will always have you as a reference, as a pillar of their lives, and you will be reasonably happy due to feeling useful and appreciated by your loved ones.
And as my grandfather would say, “Feeling useful and valued and not overeating will lengthen your life.” However, I believe that what lengthens your life is living with a smile instead of spending your life bitter.
I still remember my grandfather’s laughter and his good humor, and that’s why I wish you to smile after reading this article. For that smile to be the beginning of a more prosperous, long, and happy life.
A virtual hug
AG
Leave a Reply